I am always tired, it seems. I have to continually remind myself that God will give me rest. And He is faithful in this but I add so much of my own chaos day to day that I often feel unrested.
So, I am learning to turn continually to Him for all my needs. To not only rise above chaos, but to not create it. This is no easy task. In Letters of the Scattered Brotherhood, there is a line I read this morning which says, "...this still Presence will give you complete majestic dominion over all mankind- that disturbing mankind within yourself.....Wake, then, little, perturbed, anxious, weary, frightened children, and stand released in this holy stillness."
So, I am seeking this stillness. And I can relate completely to the 'disturbing mankind within' myself. Meaning, I need morning after morning, afternoon, night, always to allow my crucify my flesh. It's painful because the flesh does not go willingly.