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Wednesday, August 1, 2012

Procrastination

I have not been able to blog lately.  I'm not entirely sure what the problem is.  I continue to start posts and then realize I'm saying nothing so I save for later.  Going back, I find nothing worth revising.

I've been more tired than usual so that could have something to do with it.  But really, I think I'm just dry.  Spiritually dry and nothing is flowing.

I was telling my sponsor the other day how incredibly busy I was.  This, my excuse for not making step work a priority.  And I believed what I was saying.  Until a few days ago when I was on the computer playing spider solitaire (which I think may need to be uninstalled) and I realized, Oh, well here's some extra time I'm just wasting.

So, is it procrastination? Avoidance?  I don't know.  But I know that the more time I spend in the Word, the more enlightened and inspired I feel.  The more I allow myself to get trapped in pointless time sucks like Facebook or Words with Friends, the more blah I feel.  Hungry but not satisfied.

And there's a million things I should be feeling inspired about.  The kids are starting school, my own life is changing in a drastic and good way very soon and I have an opportunity I've only previously dreamed about.

Maybe I feel like I'm on hold.  Or in limbo.  The kids start school Friday.  I start my new endeavor next week and my dream opportunity is waiting only for me to finish the hard work.  And I keep thinking when all that starts, I'll get a new schedule, really get down to work. But that's a bit ridiculous.  So.....I'm posting.  Crap or not.  Because not doing so seems to leave me in a rut.


Or maybe I can get a job playing spider solitaire.






So, after I posted, I even found myself motivated to write poetry.  That's how the flow works.



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